Background information
Why I like boring films
by David Lee
The horror film that's so scary you have to sign a scare waiver
23.5.2019
Translation: machine translated
Parties on the beach, radioactive toxic waste and a monster. The result is a film that was so horrific that viewers had to absolve the cinema operator of any responsibility for deaths. This is "The Horror of Party Beach", probably the scariest horror film of all time.
"Strange atomic monsters that live on human blood!" is emblazoned in large red letters on the film poster for "The Horror of Party Beach". The "first monster horror musical" in film history from 1964 not only impressively demonstrates why the monster musical genre could not and should not establish itself - okay, the film even gets that wrong - but also suffers from excessive hubris. Or brilliant marketing.
If you wanted to watch "The Horror of Party Beach" in a US cinema back then, you had to sign the following note:
Every visitor to the film, which has since been officially added to the list of "films that are among the worst films of all time", had to officially and legally absolve the cinema operators of any responsibility should they die of fright during the screening. That's how terrible the film is.
Today, 55 years after the film was first released, the world looks different. Cinema-goers have survived the brilliant special effects from the workshop of Rob Bottin in "The Thing", were terrified of Angus Scrimm in "Phantasm", and have elevated Linda Blair as the possessed Regan in "The Exorcist" to the status of a cultural treasure. Today, we can, perhaps, endure the horror of Party Beach.
Tension on the beach
"The Horror of Party Beach" begins with a wild party on the beach. The track "Zombie Stomp" by the Del Aires plays off-screen.
Two young men get into a fight. Over a girl. A girl kisses a guy who then moves on and she kisses the next guy. Modern young people just don't know how to behave. And that rock music too.
Underwater, things are a little quieter. There is a human skeleton and radioactive toxic waste, as was common in the 1960s. The radioactive material leaks out, hits the skeleton and a terrible mutation takes its unholy course. The skeleton combines with sea anemones and protozoa. Taxonomically, this is extremely dubious, but where rock music and radioactive toxic waste are involved, anything goes.
And then? That's the end of the plot. The monster kills people, especially the wild teenagers. At pyjama parties, rock parties on the beach and other parties at the lake. Meanwhile, the good adults - someone is still sane in this wild world after all - are looking for a way to kill this terrible monster. Unfortunately, the white adults with a decent haircut make a major mistake: they ignore the wisdom of the black housekeeper. Because she knows all about voodoo, as was customary in the 1960s. Fortunately, the woman is not only black, but also extremely scatterbrained. After what feels like six million scenes of partying, murder and research, the housekeeper Eulabelle (Eulabelle Moore) spills sodium, which hits an arm severed from the monster. This then dissolves. Logically enough.
More sodium. Monster. Resolution. The whites live in peace again and the party can go on. The Del Aires play up.
The End
The film understands nothing about nothing
The problem becomes obvious pretty quickly, assuming you don't fall asleep. Because even as a trash film, "The Horror of Party Beach" is completely useless. Sure, the film has inexplicably managed to achieve cult status internationally. But as a cinematic work of art, the film fails across the board.
There's the fact that the screenwriters Richard Hilliard, Ronald Gianettino and Lou Binder have no idea how a musical works. As daft as that may sound, here's the concept of a musical. The actors act as normal people would. They do things and say words. Suddenly the realism is switched off and the actors start singing and dancing without falling out of character. An example:
In "The Horror of Party Beach", all the music comes from a tape or is played by a band in the background of the scene. But what has to be said here is that the band in the film - the Del Aires - make some decent surfer rock. Nothing crazy good, but decent.
The authors completely lack an understanding of a story and what makes it work. As a rule, every story has a character that the audience can sympathise with. Even if the protagonist of a story is unlikeable or a villain - see Ash from "Evil Dead" - he is still the character on whom the story hinges. In Party Beach, the researchers who will one day hunt down the monster are only introduced after 23 minutes. With a running time of 78 minutes, that's pretty late. And even if the researchers were to arrive earlier, they would still be a couple of white men in suits and ties with nothing to distinguish them. The teenagers in the film - aged around mid-30s - suffer the same fate and couldn't be more interchangeable. Plot is not the film's thing either. Somehow it's about little to nothing. Why does the monster have to be defeated? Sure, the creature eats a few teenagers, but the atomic monster doesn't seem really dangerous. Then it multiplies, but then somehow it doesn't. Why? When? How? All unexplained.
About the monster. You have to sign a Fright Release, and then the monster looks like this.
Yeah no, that's clear.
Why cult status?
"The Horror of Party Beach" earned its status as a cult film primarily through one appearance, decades later. This is because the film fell into the public domain soon after its release. This means that nobody claims the copyright. It is precisely these films that the comedy series "Mystery Science Theatre 3000", or MST3K for short, has used. MST3K is about a caretaker and two robots watching films in a cinema on a satellite and commenting on them.
In 1997, in the ninth season of Mystery Science Theatre, it was finally the turn of "The Horror of Party Beach". Tip: Just skip the parts that are in colour. They're never particularly good. But the parts where Mike (Michael J. Nelson) and co. make fun of the film are all the better.
"The Horror of Party Beach" is still in the public domain. This means you can simply watch the non-MST3K version of the film on YouTube.
But one more thing: if you die of fright and terror, Digitec Galaxus accepts no liability. So you may only watch the film at your own risk.
So, that's it. By the way, the film was originally supposed to be called "Invasion of the Zombies". The monster from the party beach may be undead, but zombies are something else. <p
Journalist. Author. Hacker. A storyteller searching for boundaries, secrets and taboos – putting the world to paper. Not because I can but because I can’t not.
9 comments
later